Wednesday, December 4, 2013

An Incredible Array of Heinous Snowboard & Ski Themed Christmas Sweaters

It's almost Christmas, the festival where we all celebrate terrible clothing design. Here's what happens when you combine garish woolwear with snowboarding and skiing...

Section 1 - Embarrassed people modelling Christmas sweaters

In the footsteps of the classic blog Sad Etsy Boyfriends here's our own sad Etsy boyfriend

Allright, I'll model the stupid sweater, but do I have really have to wear the jeggings?

Tinsel? What the fuck is the tinsel for? I'll only do it if I get to wear the cowboy hat.

I used to have aspirations

Despite the contrary evident of the apologetic photo, this guy has managed to deceive himself into thinking loves his jumper, in fact he wrote a whole article about it on the Telegraph.

Whereas this guy from the Late Late Toy Show has nothing to hide, he fucking loves Christmas!
and men

Section 2 - Particularly impressive miserable second-hand Christmas jumpers

Classic 80's Christmas sweater featuring a skier wearing a classic 80's Christmas sweater, featuring a skier...

A Christmas dress, extending fashion disappointment below your crotch

As camp as Christmas

Christmas sweaters used as a paedophile warning device

Section 3 - Snowboard specific Christmas jerseys

Yup, it wasn't just skiers afflicted by this

Santa snowboarding down vagina mountain

We even have our own shitty waistcoat

You can buy this one for €40 from Funky Christmas Jumpers, if you fancy ruing someone's Christmas

Section 4 - Other Christmas jumpers you can buy right now

Priced at £20 to shift at John Barrie 

This fetching Ellesse number can be yours for £40 from ASOS 

There's one available in the US for $69 from Urban Outfitters 

"This sweater is GNOMEtastic" - I'll be the judge of that mate

And you can buy this for a frankly terrifying £79 from the usually understated department store John Lewis 

Section 5 - Vintage Christmas jumpers
Proving that our elders don't know better.

You wouldn't want to run into this man of action on a lonely mountainside

Must be the latest from Shaun White's Target range

This lad in a hat is awesome. He's the gift that just keeps giving...

I aspire to be that man

Section 6 - High Fashion Christmas sweaters

You can always rely on the fashion industry to come up with some gems. This time out it's Dolce & Gabbana who pick up the reins

There's a lot to hate here, but what the guy on the right is doing to snowboarding really needs to be stopped

Section 7 - Olympic Christmas Sweaters

Not to be outdone Ralph Lauren got involved and he's done it all over the US team's Olympic uniform

Despite being an ice skater, I used to have some dignity

It's really from the say-what-you-see approach to design

Well, at least the snowboard gear should be better, it's getting designed by Burton.

Wait, what's that you say?

It's out already?

What does it look like?