Friday, February 21, 2014

Top TENuous 11 - 'Keep living of the hate ya ball bag!'

 

This week's episode features some epic Olympian poses, face-pulling and sexual positions...


10. The world's most irritating group of twats, invent new winter sport to promote some sort of chewy snack

I don't know about you but I was totally rooting for the Zorb to win.



9. The glamorous faces of figure skating




The Sad and Useless blog has pulled together a whole collection of them.

They've also spent a lot of time Photoshopping skiers onto toilets.



8. The snowboarding is basic, the filming isn't up to much, the music is fucking heinous, but the visual effect is really interesting, video of the week.




7. Snowboarding Customer Service of the Week




6. Best Infographic of the Olympics


"The Samurai Snowboarder - Mount your man and rock his half-pipe (the less-graceful description of this move: grind against homeboy's inner thigh). While he lies on the bed hop on top and straddle him with your feet planted on the ground. Then twist our torso and hips slightly away from him to rub you clit against his thigh as he moves inside you. The thrill of snowboarding without the immanent danger of careering off a snowy cliff! Everybody wins!"  

I can't help feeling they should have been promoting the double corkscrew.




This classy spread appeared in Cosmo and was illustrated by Josh McKible



5. Some classic Wintersticking from back in 1977




4. Shiny Crevasse of the Week




3. Quicksnow




2. Epic Guff

Ollie Peart from out of off of The Seasonaire, which suddenly came back to life for the 'Lympics, is currently having a stab at some video blogging. See what you make of this.

I like it, but I do find that stuck on beard a bit creepy. It is stuck-on right?



1. Some More Olympian Posing

Following on from our article about all the sad faces in the Olympic mug-shots, here are a couple of other snowboarders who have followed a long tradition of getting their kit off for the mainstream media.



Firstly, it's one half of the double medal winning spousal unit, Alena Zavarzina, who won bronze in the parallel slalom and is married to the American turned Russian gold medal slalom winner Vic Wild. She took part in a photo shoot for Pro Sports magazine, which judging from this, must be their version of Sports Illustrated...


Where she doubled-up with fellow snowboarder Alena Alekhine



And magically the sponsors stickers suddenly appeared on her board...









Julia Dujmovits from Austria ended up in 29th place in the same competition, but is also worth a mention due to her fine line in posing.

From the classical...



To the bonkers...


But what she really excels at is this very strange pose, which she rocks just about any time anyone points a camera vaguely in her direction...









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Previously on Top TENuous


 
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