Friday, November 1, 2013

Is this the most awkward snowboard company ever?

Here are ten reasons why they just might be...

1. Episode 4 of their awkward model photo shoot.

This was my first introduction to this company. Highlights include:

  • A model who has realised that she's walked into the fantasy set-up of three awkward virgins and there's no place in the latex catsuit to store her rape alarm.
  • The awkward banter.
  • The unmistakable early signs of Stockholm syndrome.
  • The long periods of unedited nothing. 
  • The guys playing hip hop music for no other reason than to try an impress the terrified model.
  • The final 10 seconds of bile-inducing flirting.


  • Everything about the guy in the background 30 seconds in...

2. The results of the awkward model photo shoot.

Why are you making me do this?

Really? This is is what you are trying to sell?

I used to have dreams.

This guy's raging boner

3. Episode 1 of their awkward model photo shoot.

Why did they think the world needed them to share four individual episodes of this? Highlights of Episode 1 include:

  • The continued awkward banter.
  • The use of the word heinie.
  • The peak into the sorry life of the men as one of them proclaims that he's "getting creative with the sheets and ramp"

  • 2 minutes in when he then boasts that "This is going to be the best video ever"

Turns out it's not.

4. Boner-man modelling their awkward hoodie.

You can add the hoodie, the logo which uninspiringly includes the silhouette of a seated snowboarder and these sunglasses to the list too.

5. Having a whole page of their website dedicated to answering the question 'What is an LED snowboard?', a question fully answered by the question itself.

6. Producing one of the worst Go Pro videos of all time.

Other than ruining my eyes, what was this for?

7. Their incredibly awkward Facebook fans.

8. The people who actually ride LED snowboards

Matching jackets - awkward

Another angle of that terrifying hat

Men who can't carry snowboards awkward

The Fonz has gone downhill a bit

You can also install awkwardness onto other things like longboards, the most awkward of skateboards

9. This is awkward. I almost forgot to mention...they make LED snowboards.

Lovely carpet though

10. Just in case LED Snowboards weren't awkward enough on their own, the same guys also make this.

The Disc Beeper, a noise-making devise that helps you locate your lost flying toys. Ever struggled to understand the concept of how you can lose your Frisbee? You're in luck, they have a handy awkward video to illustrate this eternal problem and it does feature awkward boner guy.

And here's the video about the solution to this problem in the world's most awkward commercial

Has anyone ever seen a more awkward snowboarding company?

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